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Don't Bring It to Work: Breaking the Family Patterns That Limit Success


Sylvia Lafair



9780470404362
Retail Price: $24.95
LS Price: $16.95
You Save: $8.00 (32%)


Availability: Usually ships within 24 hours

Format: Hardcover, 256pp.
ISBN: 9780470404362
Publisher: Jossey-Bass
Pub. Date: March 3, 2009

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Description and Reviews
From The Publisher:

This is the first book to explore what happens when patterns originally created to cope with family conflicts are unleashed in the workplace. Crossing the personal growth and leadership genres, it helps readers dramatically improve their professional relationships by taking control of the underlying family patterns that so frequently stymie them.

Drawing on material and experiences from Total Leadership Connections, her highly successful leadership retreat program, Lafair presents the unproductive work behavior patterns that grow out of early family relationships (often going back many generations) and provides readers with the tools they need to break free.

Written in a brisk style and offering a wealth of real-life anecdotes and practical, workbook-style exercises, the book teaches readers that it's possible to get beyond old, outmoded attempts at conflict resolution and empower themselves to make profound differences both at work and in our personal lives.

Lafair reveals thirteen most common patterns that correspond to characters familiar to anyone who has ever worked in an office:
  • Super Achiever
  • Rebel
  • Persecutor
  • Victim
  • Rescuer
  • Clown
  • Martyr
  • Splitter
  • Procrastinator
  • Drama Queen (King)
  • Pleaser
  • Denier
  • Avoider
Throughout the book she offers quick, practical and effective tools and exercises to breaking free of these patterns, without years of therapy.

You know the type—maybe he's the office cutup, or the woman who manages to look busy but avoids work, or the guy who is the long-suffering victim—there's one in every office. Perhaps you or someone you know fits one of these profiles. These behaviors are painfully annoying and stir up conflict in the office.

How can you get to the bottom of workplace behaviors that simply don't work for you or your organization?

Don't Bring It to Work explores what happens when patterns originally created to cope with family conflicts are unleashed in the workplace.?This groundbreaking book draws on the success of Sylvia Lafair's PatternAware program Total Leadership Connections. Throughout the book she shows how to break the cycle of pattern repetition and offers the tools that can turn unhealthy family baggage into creative energy that will foster better workplace associations and career success.

Lafair identifies the?thirteen most common patterns that correspond to characters familiar to anyone who has ever worked in an office: Super Achiever, Rebel, Persecutor, Victim, Rescuer, Clown, Martyr, Splitter, Procrastinator, Drama Queen or King, Pleaser, Denier, and Avoider. To help overcome destructive behavior problems, she maps out the three main steps for becoming aware of patterns and finding the way OUT:
  • Observe your behavior to discern underlying patterns
  • Understand and probe deeper to discover the origins of these patterns
  • Transform your behavior by taking action to change
The book includes a wealth of real-life anecdotes and practical, workbook-style exercises that clearly show how anyone can get beyond old, outmoded attempts at conflict resolution and empower themselves to make profound differences both at work and in their personal lives.

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Reviews

"Sylvia Lafair is an amazingly acute analyzer of human behavior. She's pinpointed the patterns that can make you sink, soar, or simply muddle through your career. If you want to take your work life, your team, or your company to the next level or—better yet—the level beyond that, read this important work. The payoff is the elusive breakthrough you've?sought for years."
—Tyler Mathisen, managing director, CNBC, and host, High Net Worth


"In this smart, useful, and much-needed book on how to work and play well with others, Sylvia Lafair teaches us how to recognize and change our own ineffective workplace behavior and how to help others get past the family baggage and office politics that prevent all of us from doing our best work."
—Daniel Pink, author, A Whole New Mind


"This book will help at work and at home. There's a gem on every page!"
—Kevin Roberts, Worldwide CEO, Saatchi & Saatchi


"One of the most original and useful books on the family/work/life balance issue."
—Warren Bennis, Distinguished Professor of Business, University of Southern California


"In this terrific book, Sylvia Lafair tells us how to leave our nonproductive behaviors and attitudes at the office door. I especially applaud her declaration that truth-telling and open communication in the workplace will breed respect and reduce insecurities. We would all do well to heed her pragmatic advice on how to bring about a positive, productive work environment."
—Ed Rendell, Governor of Pennsylvania


"The creative person is able to observe patterns, often when others sitting next to them see unconnected dots. If you think of these dots as people and the connecting lines as constructive interactions, sometimes representing ideas, sometimes love, sometimes concern, you will be an avid reader of Sylvia Lafair's book."
—Richard Saul Wurman, founder, the TED (Technology, Entertainment, and Design) Conference


 
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About the Author

Sylvia Lafair is an expert on leadership, workplace behavior, and relationships. She began her career as a family therapist and is fine-tuned to the reverberations from family life that play out in the workplace. Lafair is president of Creative Energy Options (CEO), a consulting firm with retreat centers in Pennsylvania and New Mexico, and clients that include Microsoft, AstraZeneca, Aveda Salons, and Novartis. Lafair has published numerous articles and is a much-sought-after speaker on the subjects of leadership, effective communication, conflict resolution, and creative collaboration.

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Table of Contents

 
Acknowledgments
Introduction
 
PART ONE: THE HOME-WORK CONNECTION
1Relationships at Work and at Home
2Understanding Behavior at Work and at Home
3Understanding Workplace Crises and Conflicts
 
PART TWO: THE WAY OUT-OBSERVE, UNDERSTAND, AND TRANSFORM YOUR PATTERNS
4The Thirteen Most Common Patterns in the Workplace
5Going Deep-Exploring the History of Your Family Patterns
 
PART THREE: A NEW ME, A NEW YOU, A NEW ORGANIZATION
6Defining a More Authentic You at Work
7Talking Together
8Connecting the Dots
 
Appendix
Notes
About the Author
Index


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